The First Halloween

      Sometimes people forget the origins of Halloween, let me refresh your memory. On October 31st 1788, about two month after the ratification of the Constitution. The members of the Constitutional Convention, thought they would have a fun night on the town together to celebrate their victory. So, they all gathered in Salem, Massachusetts and went out to a local pub for some beer. Now this particular pub was known as the Halloween Pub (Halloween was the maiden name of the wife of the original owner) and it was also a bed and breakfast. After a long night of drinking, the group thought it would be best to stay overnight at the Halloween Pub because they were pretty drunk. They all got rooms, said their goodnights and went to bed. That night George Washington (Delegate of Virginia) was sharing a room with John Dickinson (Delegate of Delaware). Now John Dickinson didn't drink very often and had certainly never drank this much ever in his life, so he was throwing up as soon as he laid down in his bed. After about an hour of hearing Dickinson throw, George Washington annonced "I'm going home!". Upon hearing this Benjamin Franklin (Delegate of Pennsylvania) got up and yelled, very loudly, "So am I!". Eventually the entire convention agreed to leave and they all checked out of the bed and breakfast, going out into the street.
       Now they were so drunk that none of them realized that they were all carrying their sheets with them, until after they were walking on the road, when John Rutledge (Delegate of South Carolina) screamed, "A GHOST!", pointing at Nicholas Gilman (Delegate of New Hampshire). Nobody was quite as drunk as Rutledge, so it was quickly realized that it was just Gilman with a sheet over his head. However James McHenry (Delegate of Maryland), thought this was hilarious, so he threw his sheet over his head and said, in a spooky voice, "Oooooh, I'm a ghost'. The group started laughing and they all threw their sheets over their heads, following McHenry's lead.
       Now, one person was not laughing and that was William Few (Delegate of Georgia), he was hungry. William Few had a sweet tooth and that night he was craving some candy (which back then was just sugar and nuts). Determined to get himself some candy he walked up to a random house and knocked on the door. After waiting a few minutes, a man came down and quizzically looked at the drunken politician. Few determined to get what he wanted asked for candy in the best way his drunk brain could come up with in the moment. He looked up at the man and asked in a shy voice "Treat?" The man immediately slammed the door on William Few, leaving him candyless. Not giving up hope, he moved on to the next house and knocked on the door. At this point the whole convention was watching him. After another few minutes, a woman answered the knock and looked down at Few. William Few opened his mouth to ask for candy, but before he could say anything, John Lansing, Jr. (Delegate of New York) snuck up behind Few and pulled his pants down. The intoxicated continental convention roared with laughter. William Few was standing in front of the woman, in his underwear and again his drunken brain wasn't moving very fast, so all that he could think to say was, "Trick, it's a trick, they-". The woman slammed the door in Few's face. William Few turned around in shame and pulled up his pants. Jonathan Dayton (Delegate from New Jersey) didn't want the joke to end their, so he ran up to the next door, covered in a sheet, and knocked. A man answered the door and Dayton drunkenly yelled "TRICK OR TREAT!" at the man who immediately slammed the door. The delegates thought this was extraordinarily amusing and spent the rest of the night trying to get candy from random strangers, by yelling "Trick or Treat"
       There you have it, the first Halloween, a one hundred percent true story. If you didn't know this, you probably skipped kindergarten because this is fairly common knowledge. Comment below if you want to challenge the legitimacy of these facts.

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