January 31, 2015

Saturday
Los Angles Kings @ Boston Bruins 7:00 PM
Q: Why are the Stars like grizzly bears?
A: Every fall they go into hibernation.
Happy Birthday Tyler Seguin


January 30, 2015

FRIDAY!!!!!!
Q: What position did Bruce Wayne play on his little-league team?
A: He was the bat-boy.
Happy Birthday Christian Bale

January 29, 2015

Thursday
Happy Birthday Marc Gasol
Q: What did the march say to all the madness?
A: What's all that bracket

January 28, 2015

Wednesday
Happy Birthday Frodo Baggins (Elijah Wood)
Q: How many quarters does it take to play the new Lord of the Rings arcade game?
A: None... it only takes Tolkiens!

January 27, 2015

Tuesday
Happy Birthday Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart and Lewis Carrol
Music Jokes (enjoy)
Q: What do you get when you drop a piano down a mine shaft?
A: A flat minor.
Q: What do you get if you run over an army officer with a steam roller?
A: A flat major.
Q: What do you say to an army officer as you're about to run him or her over with a steam roller?
A: Be flat, major.
Q: What do you say after you run an army officer over with a steam roller?
A: See flat major.
Q: What key is "Exploring The Cave With No Flashlight" written in?
A: C sharp or B flat.
Q: What do you get when an army officer puts his nose to the grindstone?
A: A sharp major.
Q: What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?
A: A natural major.

January 26, 2015

Monday
Two boys are playing hockey on a pond in the park in Salem, when one is attacked by a rabid Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy takes his stick, wedges it down the dog's collar and twists, breaking the dog's neck. A reporter who was strolling by sees the incident, and rushes over to interview the boy. "Young B's Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal," he starts writing in his notebook. "But I'm not a Bruins fan," the little hero replied. "Sorry, since we are in Boston, I just assumed you were," said the reporter and starts again. "Little Sock's Fan Rescues Friend From Horrific Attack" he continued writing in his notebook. "I'm not a Red Sox Fan fan either," the boy said. "I assumed everyone in Boston was either a Bruins or Red Sox fan. "What team, do you root for the Patriots?" the reporter asked. "I'm a Montreal fan." the child said. The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes, "Young Delinquent from Montreal Kills Beloved Family Pet."
Happy Birthday Wayne Gretzky


January 25, 2015

Sunday
Happy Birthday Xavi
Q: Why don't you not play soccer in the jungle?
A: There are too many cheetahs!

January 24, 2015

Saturday
Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest?
A: An Investigator
Happy Birthday Neil Diamond

January 23, 2015

Friday!!!!
Happy Birthday John Hancock
Q: If you crossed a Patriot with a curly-haired dog, what would you get?
A: Yankee Poodle

January 21, 2015

Wednesday
333rd Post!!
Boston Bruins @ Colorado Avalanche 10:00 PM
Happy Birthday Jonathan Quick
Want to hear a pizza joke…. nah, it’s too cheesy. What about a construction joke? Oh never mind, I’m still working on that one. Did you hear the one about the rope? Skip it. Have you heard the one about the guy in the wheelchair? Never mind, it’s too lame.

January 20, 2015

Tuesday
Q.What do you call coffee made from coal?
A. Tarbucks!
Boston Bruins @ Dallas Stars 8:30 PM
Happy Birthday Tom Baker

January 19, 2015

Monday
Happy Marin Luther King Jr. Day
Happy Birthday Edgar Allan Poe
Q: What do the Seattle Seahawks and a Chick-Fil-A manager have in common?
A: Neither one shows up for work on Sunday.

January 18, 2015

Sunday
Green Bay Packers @ Seattle Seahawks 3:05 PM
Indianapolis Colts @ New England Patriots 6:40 PM 
Q: What's the difference between the Indianapolis Colts and a dollar bill?
A: You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
GO PATS!!!!
Happy Birthday Vector (Victor Perkins (Jason Segel)

January 17, 2015

Saturday
Happy Birthday Benjamin Franklin
Q. What was the most popular dance in 1776?
A. The Indepen-dance.

January 15, 2015

Thursday
Happy Birthday Marie Fatyol
Q: What do you call 53 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl?
A: The Indianapolis Colts.
New York Rangers @ Boston Bruins 7:00 PM

January 14, 2015

Wednesday
Happy Birthday Victor Valdes
Knock! Knock!
Who’s there?
Snow.
Snow who?
Snow use. I forgot my name again!
Vote on my new Breakfast Poll and tell me what you like to eat for breakfast!

January 13, 2015

Tuesday
Orc No.27 walks into a bar and leaves his cave troll at the door. 
Barman: Excuse me sir, you can't leave that lyin' there.
Orc No. 27: That's not a lion, that's a cave troll.
Happy Birthday Legolas (Orlando Bloom)

January 12, 2015

Monday
Q: How many Indianapolis Colts does it take to win a Super Bowl?
A: Only one, Peyton Manning, and he plays for the Broncos.
Happy Birthday James Gordon Jr. (Nathan Gamble) (The little boy in the video)

January 11, 2015

Sunday
Happy Birthday Emile Heskey
Q: Which day of the week do chickens hate most?
A: Fry-day!

January 10, 2015

Saturday
Happy Birthday Roy E. Disney
Q: Where do you go in Baltimore in case of a tornado?
A: M&T Bank Stadium they never get a touchdown there!
Boston Bruins @ Philadelphia Flyers 1:00 PM
Baltimore Ravens @ New England Patriots 4:35 PM

January 9, 2015

FRIDAY!! (:
Happy Birthday Richard Nixon
Q. What do you call a man who rescues drowning spooks from the sea ?
A. A ghost guard !

January 8, 2015

Thursday
New Jersey Devils @ Boston Bruins 7:00 PM
Q: What's a dog's favorite song?
A: Ain't nothing but a hound dog!!
Happy Birthday Elvis Presley

January 7, 2015

WedNesDay
Q: Why do they never serve beer at a math party?
A: Because you can't drink and divide
Happy Birthday Nicholas Cage and and Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner)

January 6, 2015

Tuesday
Q: What do you call a pig that does karate? 
A: A pork chop.
Happy Birthday Mr Bean (Rowan Atkinson)



January 5, 2015

Monday
Happy Birthday Bradley Cooper
Q: Who did Frankenstein’s monster bring to prom?
A: His ghoulfriend.

January 4, 2015

Sunday
Happy Birthday Sir Isaac Newton
Q: Why can't Joe Flacco use the phone anymore?
A: Because he can't find the receiver.
Boston Bruins @ Carolina Hurricanes 1:00 PM

January 3, 2015

Saturday
Happy Birthday JRR Tolkien
Q. What did Frodo say when he saw the trees dancing?
A. "That’s ENT-ertainment!"
Ottawa Senators @ Boston Bruins 1:00 PM

January 2, 2015

Friday
Happy Birthday Cuba Gooding Jr.
Q: How do you fix a broken tomato?
A: Tomato paste!

January 1, 2015

Thursday
New Years Day - WELCOME TO 2015
New Years Resolutions Most Americans Have No Chance At Keeping
When I hear a funny joke I will not reply, "LOL, LMAO, or ROTFL!"
I will try to figure out why I "really" need 5 Facebook accounts.
I will spend less than five hour a day on the Internet.
I will read the owners manual
Spend less than $1000 for coffee at Starbucks this year.
I will think of a password other than "password"
December Holiday Poll Ended
Results:
In Last Hanukkah and Kwanzaa with 0% each.
In 3rd All of the Above with 11%
In 2nd Boxing Day with 22%
And in 1st with 66% Christmas
Please Comment an Idea for a new Poll
Check Out Version 2 of the Ultimate Reference on the sidebar and comment suggestions for Version 3
Also Check out this months Looking Back and Foward post on
Cole and Evan's Blog at http://coleandevan.blogspot.com/
Also check out some more of Cole and Evan's posts there blog is always on my sidebar
Happy Birthday Merlin (Colin Morgan) and Paul Revere ("The British are Coming" Guy)