Happy Birthday Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart and Lewis Carrol
Music Jokes (enjoy)
Q: What do you get when you drop a piano down a mine shaft?
A: A flat minor.
Q: What do you get if you run over an army officer with a steam roller?
A: A flat major.
Q: What do you say to an army officer as you're about to run him or her over with a steam roller?
A: Be flat, major.
Q: What do you say after you run an army officer over with a steam roller?
A: See flat major.
Q: What key is "Exploring The Cave With No Flashlight" written in?
A: C sharp or B flat.
Q: What do you get when an army officer puts his nose to the grindstone?
A: A sharp major.
Q: What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?
A: A natural major.
Two boys are playing hockey on a pond in the park in Salem, when one is attacked by a rabid Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy takes his stick, wedges it down the dog's collar and twists, breaking the dog's neck. A reporter who was strolling by sees the incident, and rushes over to interview the boy. "Young B's Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal," he starts writing in his notebook. "But I'm not a Bruins fan," the little hero replied. "Sorry, since we are in Boston, I just assumed you were," said the reporter and starts again. "Little Sock's Fan Rescues Friend From Horrific Attack" he continued writing in his notebook. "I'm not a Red Sox Fan fan either," the boy said. "I assumed everyone in Boston was either a Bruins or Red Sox fan. "What team, do you root for the Patriots?" the reporter asked. "I'm a Montreal fan." the child said. The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes, "Young Delinquent from Montreal Kills Beloved Family Pet."
Happy Birthday Wayne Gretzky
Boston Bruins @ Colorado Avalanche 10:00 PM
Happy Birthday Jonathan Quick
Want to hear a pizza joke…. nah, it’s too cheesy. What about a construction joke? Oh never mind, I’m still working on that one. Did you hear the one about the rope? Skip it. Have you heard the one about the guy in the wheelchair? Never mind, it’s too lame.
Green Bay Packers @ Seattle Seahawks 3:05 PM
Indianapolis Colts @ New England Patriots 6:40 PM
Q: What's the difference between the Indianapolis Colts and a dollar bill?
A: You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
Happy Birthday Vector (Victor Perkins (Jason Segel)
Tuesday Orc No.27 walks into a bar and leaves his cave troll at the door.
Barman: Excuse me sir, you can't leave that lyin' there.
Orc No. 27: That's not a lion, that's a cave troll.
Happy Birthday Legolas (Orlando Bloom)
Q: How many Indianapolis Colts does it take to win a Super Bowl?
A: Only one, Peyton Manning, and he plays for the Broncos.
Happy Birthday James Gordon Jr. (Nathan Gamble) (The little boy in the video)
Happy Birthday Roy E. Disney
Q: Where do you go in Baltimore in case of a tornado?
A: M&T Bank Stadium they never get a touchdown there!
Boston Bruins @ Philadelphia Flyers 1:00 PM
Baltimore Ravens @ New England Patriots 4:35 PM
New Years Day - WELCOME TO 2015
New Years Resolutions Most Americans Have No Chance At Keeping
When I hear a funny joke I will not reply, "LOL, LMAO, or ROTFL!"
I will try to figure out why I "really" need 5 Facebook accounts.
I will spend less than five hour a day on the Internet.
I will read the owners manual
Spend less than $1000 for coffee at Starbucks this year.
I will think of a password other than "password"
December Holiday Poll Ended
In Last Hanukkah and Kwanzaa with 0% each.
In 3rd All of the Above with 11%
In 2nd Boxing Day with 22%
And in 1st with 66% Christmas
Please Comment an Idea for a new Poll
Check Out Version 2 of the Ultimate Reference on the sidebar and comment suggestions for Version 3
Also Check out this months Looking Back and Foward post on
Cole and Evan's Blog at http://coleandevan.blogspot.com/
Also check out some more of Cole and Evan's posts there blog is always on my sidebar
Happy Birthday Merlin (Colin Morgan) and Paul Revere ("The British are Coming" Guy)